A Simple Way to Start Living a Balanced Life


 

Over the holidays I gave myself the most fantastic gift.  I want to show you how you can have it, too!

What is the New Year about anyway? Peace, tidings and good will to all – right?

I have to be real about something. At the end of last year I was not really feeling that way. In fact, there were pieces of me that were feeling burnt out. If I am going to be really true with myself, there were pieces that I wanted to say forget it.  I wanted to go live on a little island somewhere and just chill.

Seriously, I had some pretty dark thoughts. I needed to revisit my truth. I needed to BE with myself and I needed to have some time away.

Here is what I decided to do which not only changed my perspective, but it gave me a clearer picture of who I am here to become.

It gave me clarity on how to live my life more authentically and I received the natural motivation I have been seeking instead of feeling forced by the shoulds in my life.

So… If you are feeling forced in your life, overwhelmed by the shoulds and a bit lacking in the motivation department of your life – I have something really cool to share with you.

I chose to take a techno fast. Here is what I did.  

I took Facebook and my email off my phone.

I shut my down my computer and I did not check email for almost 3 weeks.

Now it is up to you…How you want to run your own techno fast?

Here are the rules:

1.) Set a time frame – you don’t have to do it as long as mine, but I would suggest a minimum of 5 days. It can take awhile to come off the adrenaline of checking something every 5 minutes.

2.) Set yourself up for success – take email off your phone, put away your computer because you WILL be tempted. If you have ever done a food cleanse you will know what I mean.

3.) Tell people in your life – so you are accountable.

After a few days you realize that all the emotions that you have been avoiding by hopping on Facebook or checking email every few minutes.

Stuff will come up for you; it’s good!

You will be more closely aligned with your Femmes.  You will gain clearer ideas about your own prosperity, pleasure and balance as a woman.

Once you have this time – utilize it!  You will see how much time you spend focused on other people’s agendas, other people’s opinions of you and settle into the quiet. Start to journal during your techno fast.  Ask yourself what are you really wanting? What have you not been liking? What do you require to change in your life to start loving it again?

These answers are invaluable to us and they can change the direction and results in our lives immediately.

When you return I invite you to set your intention.  Bring the balance of your life back with you.

I have chosen NOT to add Facebook or email back to my phone.  Also, I have also chosen not to check email or open my computer over the weekends.

You will feel more in control of your life than you have in a long time and settle back into the natural state of balance that is calling you.

What do you do to re-balance your life?

FemmeType Insight:This is for your Indie, she requires time and space to re-balance.

Your Frenchie loves creating space for herself to realign.

Your New Yorker will receive what she needs to make her next move this year.

Click here to read full transcript of this video

Elegant Femme Weekly Ezine: A Simple Way To Start Living a Balanced Life

Hi. This is Tara Marino with Elegant Femme. Welcome to winter wonderland. My goodness it’s freezing! It’s been snowing I think about a couple of hours now. It’s gorgeous. Hopefully you can see me clearly.

Alright, this is what I want to talk to you about today; because here we are at the beginning of the year and, what’s the New Year about anyway, right? It’s about good tidings, and cheer to all, and peace. I want to be real with you about something. At the end of last year, I wasn’t feeling that way at all. In fact, I was having some kind of pretty dark, and ugly thoughts like forget it; do I really want to do any of this anymore? I was feeling overwhelmed; I was feeling disconnected from my truth; I was really finding myself in a place that I was starting to operate more in the “shoulds” of my life; can you relate to that? Really, getting into that space where you are doing everything on auto pilot. You’re so plugged-in; you’re just running on adrenaline, and you’re overwhelmed, and you’re totally out of balance. Okay, well that’s where I was.

So I decided to do some things that some people, especially my husband, considered very extreme; like is that really necessary; do you really need to do that; I mean c’mon isn’t 30 minutes enough? So, here’s what I did, and here’s why it’s important to you. I gave myself a fantastic gift, and I want to show you how you can give it to yourself too. So what I’ll be teaching you in the video today you’re going to be realizing and understanding how you can too step back into balance, step back into clarity, and step back into that authentic knowing; back to that natural source of motivation; instead of doing force step back into your natural power. So I’m going to be showing you the three steps so that you can get back on balance.

Let me tell you first what I did:

December 20th I decided I was going to take a techno fast. There was a little planning involved, but December 20th was when it started, and I decided that I was going to not check my email; not open my computer; and I took Facebook and email off my phone, and I decided that from December 20th until January 7th I was off, offline. Okay?

Now, I want to tell you what happened because at first there definitely was some anxiety. I’ve realized how much I was depending on other people’s opinion, and other people’s agendas of what I was doing throughout the day. And after a few days, something new started to happen. I started to ask myself some deeper questions; I started to realize what it was I didn’t like, and started to reconnect with what it was I do like. Really – amazing way to start the New Year. So, I have a very strong recommendation for you.

I invite you to do a techno fast, and I have to tell you that I’m getting some rolling eyes behind the camera; so you might feel some resistance around this. It’s not the easiest thing to do, and you know I run my business online, right? So is it my personal best interest to tell you to do and invite you to do what I’m going to tell you? Maybe not. Is it in the highest good? Absolutely. And that is what I’m concerned with. I’m committed to women living their truth, living their beauty and living fully their sensual lives, and in order for us to do that we need to be connected with who we really are, okay?

So here are the rules for a techno fast:

1. You need to set a time frame. Now, you don’t have to make it as long as mine, but I do suggest truly a minimum of 5 days. I know that feels like a lot. This is why; over the first couple of days you’re going to feel an intensity to just check real quick; to just do this. It takes a few days to really start to separate yourself from that kind urge, and come around the 3rd, 4th day you’ll start to settle in to the freedom around it, and I’ll be advising you to ask yourself some questions during that time. So number 1, you need to set yourself a time frame.

2. You need to set yourself out for success. I suggest you put your computer away. I suggest that you take email and Facebook off your phone. It doesn’t mean that you can’t put them back on later but for this techno fast this is just to take them off because you will be tempted. Anyone who’s ever got any kind of food cleansed you know what I’m talking about. You take the chocolate or whatever it is out of the house, and you don’t go to your favorite restaurant during a cleanse. So same thing; you want to set yourself out for success.

3. You need to be held accountable. Tell somebody. In fact, tell more than one person that you’re doing this. In fact, what I did is I told all my groups; I shared with the entire community, and I put it on Facebook. So one of the things you might want to do is put in on Facebook; you know what, I’m doing a techno fast so the next x amount of days you’re not going to see me on here. And then somebody sees you poking on there, they’re going to oh, oh, okay? So hold yourself accountable.

So those are the three rules: set a time frame, set yourself out for success, and make yourself accountable. As I shared with you, you’re going to feel more balanced; you’re going to feel more connected to your authentic truth, and you’re going to find a natural source of motivation. So when the time to return back after your techno fast; I have some ideas for you as well.

I suggest you set your intention for coming back. I had a little bit of anxiety about oh my goodness what is it going to look like when I open up my computer after three weeks. So I set my intention around what I wanted to be like when I came back, and I chose to bring some of the principles with me. You might find, actually let me tell you this; what I want you to do on that 4th or 5th day is to journal, and I want you to ask yourself what are you not liking in your life right now; what is it that you really are liking, and what is it that you want to infuse more of into your live so you can love it again. Please, that’s why we’re here. It’s why we’re here. Love it! Alright, so this will give you the chance to do that.

Now you might want to carry something back with you when you come back online from your techno fast. I chose to not put email back on my phone. I am choosing not to open up my computer or check email during the weekend. So these are the things that felt really freeing to me that I’m keeping that opportunity and that promise to myself.

So, here’s what I want you to do now: I want you to email us back, and I want you to tell us if you’re going to be doing this or you’re not going to be doing it. So email us a response back or comment, that part; comment below, you know, wherever you find it, comment; let me know if you’re going to be doing the techno fast so we can hold you accountable, and if you’re not going to be doing it why, okay? So the rules again: set your time frame, set yourself up for success, and make yourself accountable. Comment on this email and let us know, are you doing it or not, and why.

Happy techno fasting.

[end of transcript]


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11 Responses to A Simple Way to Start Living a Balanced Life

  1. Carrie Dale says:

    I would LOVE to do a techno fast, because I am starting to feel like a slave to my computer, e-mail, phone. I feel so inundated with information and constant busy-ness that I do feel like I cant hear my truth as clearly right now.
    Tara, would you recommend this to those of us who are part of the Project Desires Movement? Or maybe tweaking the fast a bit to allow a certain amount of time for that?

    • tara says:

      Carrie,

      This is a GREAT question and yes you must PLAN your techno fast. The Project Desires movement is a positive source of energy and connecting with that is good. However disconnecting from everything will also SERVE your desires in growing into more authentic heart based desires. Here is what you may choose to do. Look at your schedule and plan to do a techno fast Thurs-Sunday. That is a 4 day techno-fast. Maybe you start next week? During that time you set up your success, no email, no opening computer, no checking anything;) and let the PD people know. Then when you return on Monday you can share your discoveries.

  2. Sandy Mauck says:

    I have this as my New Year's vison, to do techno fasts at least one day a week. Recently, I had a 2-1/2 day spa retreat with a friend and cut techno time down 90%. We did watch a dvd, I checked my phone 1-2x a day, but way less frequently and the only time I used the computer was to make sure some money had come into my account on time and to settle an argument about the definition of a word. It definitely had an effect and I recommend anyone to begin fasting at their own speed. Thanks for the encouragement

  3. Rosie Hirst says:

    Tara I LOVE this idea! it's so easy to have our time commandeered by the so many interesting opportunities (and shiny new things) online. Sandy thanks so much for the idea of the one day a week techno fast, that's more doable for me now that the holidays are over. It feels like total luxury to take 3 weeks, and I'm going to add it to my planner to be considered next holidays. Writing this on the fly, am considering taking a one week techno fast to start off though, will need to check in on plans to clarify a good time for it.
    Thanks also Tara for the suggestions on how to best manage it. I've always resisted email on my phone, though I do check the server occasionally.
    There's a real sense of freedom in even considering this possibility. Thankyou ladies.

  4. Candice says:

    I would love to do a techno fast, sounds so liberating! The only thing keeping me from doing one would be the fact that I am enrolled in online classes and would fall behind. I may have to schedule something like this on the next break. Also I'd be concerned that I would miss my email regarding the Project Desires Movement!! THAT can't happen! : ) LOVE the idea!

  5. Andrea says:

    I find that the easiest way for me to techno-fast is to have less of the techno gadgets around. With a gadget-mad husband and two teen boys in the house there is always a queue to watch the one tv and use the one computer we have in our house, which means I am always the last to access these things, leaving me free to find other more rewarding activities to engage in :-) My VERY basic phone also allows me to just use it for it's intended purpose - as a phone, purely to talk to people - and I only use it sparingly to help budget.
    Plan all the activities you have been longing to do during the fast and make sure you do them - the feeling of success and motivation comes from that.

  6. Laura says:

    With your techno fast announcement in December, I took the opportunity to remove myself from MANY info / marketing email lists, blog subscriptions and FB groups. A four day techno fast (Thurs - Sun) sounds challenging but oh so good although, for me, I favor the idea of not telling anyone. I feel like we've become a society that perpetually expects immediate gratification, be it pleasure, information or a response. Because I have no business, I think I can safely complete a techno fast and not worry about someone's lack of immediate gratification by a response from me. I like to think my example may send a little ripple into my "community" that a little wait is okay and maybe my ripple will affect someone else. Who knows? Maybe Elegant Femmes across the world can create a pause or reduction in the amount of techno use, slow down the need for immediate gratification and cause the world to live more alive, awake and engaged?

  7. Cocoa says:

    I'm going to have to think about this! Since I work on a computer all day for a living, I don't see it working out very well unless I go on vacation (in April!). I know exactly what you mean by being tempted and I'm online all day 5 days a week! I will commit to taking a full weekend off in February though. I'll put the computer away at 6 PM Friday and not touch it again until 9 AM Monday the weekend of Feb 16th - it's in my calendar!

  8. Jennifer says:

    I did a bit of a techno fast (1 week, but no journaling, etc) over the holidays and it was wonderful! I found myself connecting with my husband and kids on a much deeper level and not allowing my days to be swallowed up by technical "time suck" activities. My main challenge was when it was over and my email box was filled with messages and a few people were disappointed with my lack of response. Then I realized that this too was a great message as I'm a "people pleaser" and have a hard time disappointing ANYONE. Well, the world didn't stop spinning and those people's lives weren't ruined, and my INNER CIRCLE was strengthened. Boundaries are a good thing, especially for me, and this was a wonderful venue to strengthen them.
    Thanks Tara!
    PS: I intend to take techno fasts every Sunday for the rest of the year. This will be difficult at first, but I hope to make it a habit that might even rub off & inspire those around me! Might do the full fast in March for my birthday/vacation.

  9. Katherine Bell says:

    I followed your idea to take Facebook and email off of my phone, and I am NEVER going back. I love it! It's incredible that such a little change can produce such a feeling of freedom and lightness. Now I respond to messages at a set time that works for me, and no longer feel like I'm obligated to be at the beck and call of the entire online world. Thank you for the suggestion!

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